A Few Reasons I Owe My Mother

I will be linking this to "Feel Good Friday" this week, because it makes me smile everytime I read these. I can just hear my mom saying these things. I grew up when it was still okay to spank your children. I can never remember any of us getting a spanking. Heavens knows I sure deserved more than one. I did get grounded once for smoking, but dad talked mom out of it after a week because he was tired of hearing me whine about not being able to do anything.

This was sent to me by a funny, sweet friend. As I read, I thought how true, hope you can see your Mom in a few of these, or worse, yourself. Thanks Sue!

1. My mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that this will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me about LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.

7. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

8. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks like a tornado went through it."

9. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father."

10. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

11. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

12.My mother taught me about ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were raised in a barn."

13. My Mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

14. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your coat on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

15. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."

Don't tell me you don't recognize all or a few of these.

Happy Mother's Day